Monday Musing: The Gift of Doors

{Second story doors in the French Quarter, New Orleans}

I love doors, both literally and figuratively. In New York, we are warned at every stop on the subway to "please stand clear of the closing doors." These are literal doors that will close on you and not feel so good if you get caught in them. In The Sound of Music, Mother Superior says, "When God closes a door, somewhere He opens a window." These are the figurative doors of which good musicals are made. The character finds a new, creative way to get to the other side.

When a door stays open, you don't have to make a choice about whether you want to be inside or outside. People, sound, light and everything else flows freely in and out. Sometimes this is desirable because you don't have to make a choice about whether to be inside or outside. When I was living in Florida, many people had their living rooms set up in their garages. I even saw a couple fully decorated Christmas trees in garages. On nice days (which was almost every day) they opened the garage door and had a pleasant indoor/outdoor space. They didn't have to make a choice about being inside or outside. They had both.

Sometimes there is a door, but it opens easily and stays open. Opportunities arise, we grab them, and the rest is history. However, there are times in life when a closed door helps us. It forces us to make a choice about being inside or outside. When faced with an obstacle, we must make a commitment to remove the obstacle or walk away. When things come easily, we don't have this moment of decision, and it doesn't serve us well. One example is in this New York Times article on the downside of cohabitating before marriage. Couples just eased into a relationship without ever assessing whether they really wanted it. In many cases, it turned out they didn't really want it.

When something does not come easily, assess whether you really want it. Welcome the "closed door" as an opportunity to consider your options. If you really want it, find the open window that Mother Superior was talking about.

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To read a curated collection of posts from this blog plus other writings of mine, check out my new book, "Urban Nomad USA: Travel Sized Life Coaching for Journeys of All Sorts" now available for purchase! Better yet, get a signed copy at the book release cabaret in New York City on May 8, or contact Dawn to do the cabaret with your organization in May or August, 2012.

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